Ever wonder what life on earth is really all about? I have. In fact, I still do from time to time. Even when life seems to be going at it's best for me, I sometimes find myself wondering, "is this all there is?" I'm not sure why I do this. It could be because I'm yearning for my "real" home in heaven, but I don't know for sure.
I've been a Christian most of my life and have learned a few things, but one of the most important lessons I've learned is that there is so much more yet to learn. I was surprised to find that as my years grew on, I would both unlearn and relearn some important and exciting things about God at different stages in my life.
Yes, I still wonder about life, and to some extent I probably always will as long as I remain on planet earth. But I plan on always being a learner as well. As exciting as life can be, there is more. I'm sure of it! I don't know about you, but I don't want to leave this world having missed out on anything God had planned for me.
The birth of our ancestor's first sin not only brought about more sin and tragic results, but additional responsibilites as well. What the Bible refers to as God's "plan and purpose" for our lives, translates into a significantly important, though sometimes difficult job assigned to each one of us. Down through the ages, and up to today, God's Word tells us that we have a job to do...a job in addition to caring for the earth.
Though I believe we are each given different tasks according to personalty and gifts, one task we all have concerns Jesus' last words of instructions to his followers to "go" and to "tell" about God's love, to "baptize and make disciples" of all nations. I often struggle with a sense of failing in this particular area of God's plan and purpose for me. I don't believe I am alone in this.
I love the Lord with all my heart and have many stories to tell of God's incredible faithfulness. I have obeyed God's call to "go tell" on several occasions and will still do so when the door opens. I try to share God's love as much as I know how to, but sadly, I am afraid I am not as faithful as I could be, or even wish to be.
I know I miss many opportunities. I'm in my late 60's and am still trying to find out exactly what it is that God wants me to do.
A couple of years I went to Ecuador for a short mission trip with my Life Group at church. It was a wonderful, inspiring, and hopefully a time of blessing for others. A short mission trip, yes, but I walked in obedience. I was only there to help a missionary couple with the children in their mission school. Did it help any in the grand scheme of God's plan? I'm not sure. I pray so.
I am reading Richard Foster's book on Prayer and feeling quite inadequate in my efforts at prayer. But something I've just read made me stop today and consider that perhaps I'm "trying" too hard! Perhaps it's not suppose to be a matter of desperately trying to "find" God's will for my life. Perhaps, after all, it's the small steps of obedience that are God's plan and purpose for someone like me. Or for any of us!
Perhaps if I keep going through the doors as they open for me, praying,(even if they are basically thought prayers thrown up to God as if He were a good friend!)keep seeking to love God more, to know and understand His graciousness and continue asking God to help me to really love others as myself...then perhaps one day I'll find out that this was what life is all about!
I think it might be okay, it might even be more than okay actually, to simply rest in the Lord at this point in my life. Anyone who has read some of my other writings will recognize that I've struggled with this issue of how I spend my time and of not "doing" enough for the Lord for some time. This seems to be my spiritual archilles heel in that it opens a door to the temptation of feeling that God is not pleased with me. When I am thinking right, however, I see this kind of thinking for what it is...as one of Satan's lies set out to discourage.
Feeling good about taking time to simply "rest" in the Lord has surfaced as being of the utmost importance as of late. I don't want to give up on growing spiritually, or any other way for that matter, simply because I have a few years on me...that's not what I mean at all. But, if I'm honest, I will admit that my spiritual "get up and go" is often waning as a sense of tired wonder overtakes my mind from time to time. This is especially true when I ponder all that I am not doing!
I grew up in an era when a song, "Is That All There Is?" was popular by a singer named Peggy Lee. These words seem to have stayed with me all these years, "Is that all there is my friend? If that's all there is, my friend, then let's keep dancing!" The words might sound cynical and perhaps they were meant to be. But I find comfort in them in an odd sort of way. To me, "let's keep dancing" means to keep on loving, seeking, and walking in obedience to God.
What's life about? Well, for each one of us I suppose there will be some commonalities as well as differences. For me, it's what I've just mentioned. Sure, it's still about struggle, pain, loss, and much of what Adam and Eve experienced in a sinful world. But it's also about the occasional successes and joys, about God's incredible and unconditional love, about Jesus' sacrifice being all that will ever be needed to cover my sins and make this life a stepping stone to the next, and about God the Holy Spirit who is my Guide, my Counselor, my Comforter and who will one day accompany me to my real Home where I will understand the true meaning of what life on this earth was all about anyway.
Meanwhile, "If that's all there is, my friend, then let's keep dancing!"
Friday, March 22, 2013
The age old argument of faith vs works...
I saw it on a van not long ago...large, bold, not to be missed, cap letters encircling the back window were the words: "Hands that serve are holier than lips that pray.' While one might understand some circumstances that could lead someone to say this, without further explanation, it seemed to me a pretty brazen statement.
However, to reverse this and say, "Lips that pray are holier than hands that serve" would, to me, be equally as brazen without further explanation.
I have to admit that the van's statement certainly does make me wonder where the owner of the van was coming from. This van owner might be a Christian, or not...we don't know. Perhaps the owner has been hurt by someone who prayed but felt no inclination to offer a hand of help in Christian charity in a time of need. Or perhaps this person is not a believer in prayer and its power at all.
I'll never know circumstances that would lead one to put such a bold statement on their car, but my mind is called back once again to how Christians down through the ages have argued over what pleases God the most. Is it faith, or is it works? This very thing is a matter of discussion in the Bible, in the 2nd chapter of James, and brings clarity that, at least for me, puts an end to the matter. Still, the argument goes on, and will most likely until the end of time. I can't help it though, I'm always saddened when people try to pit faith and works against one another when they are, like breathing in and breathing out, meant to be inseparable.
Friday, August 26, 2011
The Story of God, the Story of Us
Sean Gladding's book, "The Story of God, the Story of Us" is my morning reading right now, and I am being blessed with his creative and thought provoking way of retelling the Old Testament and hitting highlights through the stories of the "old man" who is reminding his people why it is that they are in captivity in Babylon. I'm taking all the time I need to process those things that especially speak to me...as I should, but at the same time I am anxious to see how he presents the New Testament.
This most excellent reading takes me back to something I heard soon after Greg and I joined YWAM as students in Lausanne, Switzerland. Speaking in one of the school worship settings, Loren Cunningham talked about the importance of "every" Christian being ready at all times to tell others about the love of God.
This was frightening sounding to me as I was unsure of exactly how to go about this. I seem to have an evangelist's heart, but lack the confidence. I have never been one to beat anyone over the head With the word of God (so to speak) and am very uncomfortable with others doing this as well. What a turn off these "Bible thumpers" can be! What Loren went on to say was a huge relief. For the first time verbally witnessing seemed within my reach as a natural thing to do.
He reminded us that there is not one person in the world that does not long to know God. Many have just not yet realized it yet. They are searching alright, but do not know yet exactly what it is that they are searching for. Herein lies the call of every Christian's mission. Just as Jesus' last words to the disciples was to " go and tell...", these are Christ's last recorded words to all of us.
Now...how to do that, right? Some of us are not bent like the make-no-bones-about-it Prophet Elijah, or any other prophet for that matter. But, YWAM's Founder did not leave us there. He told us what many others already knew, but I had never before heard at that time.
He said two things I will never forget about being prepared to share about who God is:
1) Show the person story/people how the story of God intersects with their own story!
(Make it personal or it may never hit home in the hearts of some. My personal comment here in parentheses, not Lorens.)
2) Always have your personal testimony ready. Make it short and relevant.
(Regarding #2, we were cautioned in one of our YWAM entry level class that, other than our personal salvation experience testimony or some other major miraculous testimony, that if our testimony of what God has done for us more than 3 months old, we might need to pay more attention to our sensitivity to the workings of the Holy Spirit in our daily lives.
This most excellent reading takes me back to something I heard soon after Greg and I joined YWAM as students in Lausanne, Switzerland. Speaking in one of the school worship settings, Loren Cunningham talked about the importance of "every" Christian being ready at all times to tell others about the love of God.
This was frightening sounding to me as I was unsure of exactly how to go about this. I seem to have an evangelist's heart, but lack the confidence. I have never been one to beat anyone over the head With the word of God (so to speak) and am very uncomfortable with others doing this as well. What a turn off these "Bible thumpers" can be! What Loren went on to say was a huge relief. For the first time verbally witnessing seemed within my reach as a natural thing to do.
He reminded us that there is not one person in the world that does not long to know God. Many have just not yet realized it yet. They are searching alright, but do not know yet exactly what it is that they are searching for. Herein lies the call of every Christian's mission. Just as Jesus' last words to the disciples was to " go and tell...", these are Christ's last recorded words to all of us.
Now...how to do that, right? Some of us are not bent like the make-no-bones-about-it Prophet Elijah, or any other prophet for that matter. But, YWAM's Founder did not leave us there. He told us what many others already knew, but I had never before heard at that time.
He said two things I will never forget about being prepared to share about who God is:
1) Show the person story/people how the story of God intersects with their own story!
(Make it personal or it may never hit home in the hearts of some. My personal comment here in parentheses, not Lorens.)
2) Always have your personal testimony ready. Make it short and relevant.
(Regarding #2, we were cautioned in one of our YWAM entry level class that, other than our personal salvation experience testimony or some other major miraculous testimony, that if our testimony of what God has done for us more than 3 months old, we might need to pay more attention to our sensitivity to the workings of the Holy Spirit in our daily lives.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
SELF ESTEEM VS. SELF WORTH
The value of every human life is tremendous and cannot be seen in measurements that meet the eye! Each one of us are worth much more than what we have, what we do, what we know, look like or experience; yet at every turn the world seems to dictate that it is these very things that should be esteemed and that carry the highest value in life.
Our level of self-esteem and the level of importance we place upon most aspects of all human life is often colored by current marketing strategies, all manner of media, misguided peers, and society in general. Sadly, whatever happens to be "popular" at the moment is the gauge often used in ranking the esteem level of both self and others. From pre-teen to senior citizen, the difference between one's self-worth and the lies we have come to believe is tremendous.
As one whose sense of self-esteem was practically non-existant a few years back, I will be forever thankful to my pastor who helped me see, with clarity, the marked difference between self-esteem and self-worth. My next blog will be one of sharing this difference as it was shared with me. It is my hope that my words, which will come from my own experience, will speak into the life of at least one person who might be struggling with their own sense of self-worth right now.
Our level of self-esteem and the level of importance we place upon most aspects of all human life is often colored by current marketing strategies, all manner of media, misguided peers, and society in general. Sadly, whatever happens to be "popular" at the moment is the gauge often used in ranking the esteem level of both self and others. From pre-teen to senior citizen, the difference between one's self-worth and the lies we have come to believe is tremendous.
As one whose sense of self-esteem was practically non-existant a few years back, I will be forever thankful to my pastor who helped me see, with clarity, the marked difference between self-esteem and self-worth. My next blog will be one of sharing this difference as it was shared with me. It is my hope that my words, which will come from my own experience, will speak into the life of at least one person who might be struggling with their own sense of self-worth right now.
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Sacredness in loosing a job? Really?
This past January, I was laid off from my job of 7 years. I knew it was coming so it was not a surprise, but still, it was a bit of a shock when it actually happened. I suppose I thought something would happen at the last minute, and I would not have to be let go. That was not the case!
I worked for the Upper Room in Nashville, and because it is a not for profit organization, I could not apply for unemployment. However, given my age (yup, I'm a senior citizen!) and adding this to my 7 years worked, I was able to retire. Just barely, but it added up and I was able to receive a bit of retirement money as I left.
Shortly after I was told my job was being dissolved and my last day would be January 31st, I felt an inner peace. Oh, I still had my moments of hurt, fear, and anger, but, thankfully, they left almost as quickly as they came. Each time a horrible thought or negative feeling surfaced, I cried out, "Lord, please forgive me and help me to trust you in all this." And, each time I was reminded of ways in which the Lord had taken care of me in the past when things looked bleak.
My attitude and spirit soon came back to that place where I knew I could place my life securely in God's holy hands. As my worries dissipated with remembrances of past storms the Lord walked me through, calmed me down and filled my heart with the peaceful assurance of his presence and the assurance of his unfailing love.
It's been almost 10 months now, and I feel so much happiness and freedom in not being tied down to a 9-5 job. I have found 4 different part time jobs to take up my time and bring in the money to do my part in paying our bills, and surprisingly with these jobs I even have more time to spend with my morning devotions, writing, and doing just about everything in a more relaxed way.
I'm not sure how it has happened, but my husband and are traveling more, doing more fun things together in general, and because of an unexpected financial management class at a friends church, we were able to get some long term bills paid and even have a bit of money invested and in the bank!
So...how did such beauty come out of ashes? Is it because I'm such a "good person?" Or, because I'm one of God's favorite little darlings? Of course not! On both counts, absolutely not!
Though things will not happen exactly the same way for each one of God's children, I believe the answer lies in the fact that Jesus promised that if we seek Him, we will find Him. If we knock, the door will be opened for us. This is what I did, and what each of us do when we repent and call on the Lord for help in being the person we know God created us to be. It's there for all of us!
Yes, I believe with all my heart that I can sense the sacredness of God, even in the painful process of loosing of a job! What a mighty God we serve! What a mighty serving God who loves and cares so diligently for each one of us!
I worked for the Upper Room in Nashville, and because it is a not for profit organization, I could not apply for unemployment. However, given my age (yup, I'm a senior citizen!) and adding this to my 7 years worked, I was able to retire. Just barely, but it added up and I was able to receive a bit of retirement money as I left.
Shortly after I was told my job was being dissolved and my last day would be January 31st, I felt an inner peace. Oh, I still had my moments of hurt, fear, and anger, but, thankfully, they left almost as quickly as they came. Each time a horrible thought or negative feeling surfaced, I cried out, "Lord, please forgive me and help me to trust you in all this." And, each time I was reminded of ways in which the Lord had taken care of me in the past when things looked bleak.
My attitude and spirit soon came back to that place where I knew I could place my life securely in God's holy hands. As my worries dissipated with remembrances of past storms the Lord walked me through, calmed me down and filled my heart with the peaceful assurance of his presence and the assurance of his unfailing love.
It's been almost 10 months now, and I feel so much happiness and freedom in not being tied down to a 9-5 job. I have found 4 different part time jobs to take up my time and bring in the money to do my part in paying our bills, and surprisingly with these jobs I even have more time to spend with my morning devotions, writing, and doing just about everything in a more relaxed way.
I'm not sure how it has happened, but my husband and are traveling more, doing more fun things together in general, and because of an unexpected financial management class at a friends church, we were able to get some long term bills paid and even have a bit of money invested and in the bank!
So...how did such beauty come out of ashes? Is it because I'm such a "good person?" Or, because I'm one of God's favorite little darlings? Of course not! On both counts, absolutely not!
Though things will not happen exactly the same way for each one of God's children, I believe the answer lies in the fact that Jesus promised that if we seek Him, we will find Him. If we knock, the door will be opened for us. This is what I did, and what each of us do when we repent and call on the Lord for help in being the person we know God created us to be. It's there for all of us!
Yes, I believe with all my heart that I can sense the sacredness of God, even in the painful process of loosing of a job! What a mighty God we serve! What a mighty serving God who loves and cares so diligently for each one of us!
Apolopgy offered after a long unexcused absence!
Oh my, where has time gone? It's been well over a year since I created this blog site and meant to keep it up regularly. How embarassing, yet how typical of what can happen in the fastness of life when our priorities are out of focus. My sincere apology to anyone who may have come to this site only to find inactive.
My hope is to begin again, only this time with greater determination and a more ferverant desire. My prayer is that the person reading this apology and new promise will be forgiving and willing to take a chance on someone (me!) being here to respond to visitor's posts and to put up new blogs at least on a bi-monthly basis.
Come back, stick around a while, and give it a go again if you will. We can find plenty to talk about regarding the sacredness of our Lord and that is found in everyday life.
Blessings,
gerrie
My hope is to begin again, only this time with greater determination and a more ferverant desire. My prayer is that the person reading this apology and new promise will be forgiving and willing to take a chance on someone (me!) being here to respond to visitor's posts and to put up new blogs at least on a bi-monthly basis.
Come back, stick around a while, and give it a go again if you will. We can find plenty to talk about regarding the sacredness of our Lord and that is found in everyday life.
Blessings,
gerrie
Monday, August 18, 2008
"What you hear in the night, you must speak in the day."
Hopefully my friend Tina will forgive me the paraphrasing of her words (see at the end of this blog) concerning the age old struggle between the Marys and the Marthas of the world. Her comment concerns something that I found myself particularly wrestling with several years ago while attending a 5-Day Academy for Spiritual Formation just outside Nashville, TN.
I had always identified more with Mary as far back as I could remember, but at this retreat, I came face to face with the fact that I had somehow, over the years, become more of a Martha!
When Tina mentioned this, my thoughts went flying back to a truly sacred moment, unlike any other I have ever experienced, when the Lord spoke to me…even in the midst of my complaining! I would like to share that remarkable moment with those who read this blog.
The tremendously gifted teacher, and our main speaker, Bob Mulholland (Author of Shaped by the Word) stopped in the middle of an afternoon talk and instructed us to take our Bibles, find a quiet spot somewhere on the grounds, and read the story of Mary and Martha. We were instructed to listen to what God might be saying to us in the midst of the reading. My heart sank! How many times had I read this story? How many retreats had I been to where this particular story was used as its focus? And now...at a Spiritual Formation Academy...here it was one more time!
Determined to find something positive in the assignment, I was immediately excited at the prospect of finding a spot outdoors, leaving the stuffy classroom behind for 30 minutes or so. It was a gorgeous fall day and the gentle breeze seemed to beckon me to come sit under a huge, old oak tree. I felt that with so many of my senses involved, surely I would be drawn into a state where some sort of pleasant communion with the Creator of the universe would take place!
As I sat down and found the scripture about the two sisters, I marked the spot and immediately closed my Bible. I just did not want to deal with it! I shut my eyes, leaned my head against the tree and felt the brush of a falling leaf float past the tip of my nose. How wonderful! What I wanted was for the Lord to come to me. I wanted to be with God...that's all! Just to sit with the Lord for a while...saying nothing, doing nothing. Just being with Him!
I found myself silently saying, over and over again, "Come Lord Jesus, I just want to be with you." Time and time again I said this until, seemingly out of nowhere, I realized a presence in a white robe was standing in front of me. I knew it was Jesus! I sat so still, not wanting the moment to pass!
Then He spoke! I'll never forget that moment...never forget His words. He said my name first of all! He said, "Gerrie, I want to tell you how much I love you. I've told you in so many different ways, but you keep forgetting." He did not say this with any sign of reprimand at all! It was as though he might have added, "and I'll keep telling you, as often as I need to."
My words, though I never opened my mouth, came back to Him, "But how can you love me as you did when I was a little child? So eager, so open?" His gentle response was priceless as He lovingly said, "To me, you've never changed." Oh my! How my heart speeds up as I remember these words.
The non-verbal conversation continued. I did not want the moment to end, but I remained sitting in complete silence...saying nothing for a while. Then I remembered, with a bit of guilt, the unopened Bible on my lap and the Mary and Martha assignment! Jesus knew my thoughts and said, "It's ok...go ahead. I will go with you into the scriptures."
Suddenly I found myself being defensive with God, saying, "but, someone had to feed the guests, Lord!" Then, I'll never forget this remarkable lesson as Jesus said my name the second time. He said, "Gerrie, I fed the 5,000, I could have taken care of this!" Once again, I felt no reprimand at all in his voice. I smiled at His words though as I opened my Bible and began reading.
That is where my account of this very real experience ends. It was a most extraordinary experience with the Lord. In this I identify with the scripture that says, "what you have heard in the night, you must speak in the day." It seems that it applies to this experience. I believe that what is given to one as a message from the Lord, though it is often very personal for a season, is eventually meant to be shared with those who have ears to hear.
I have shared with you, the reader. I pray you have heard these words and somehow been blessed by them, for these words were given to you as much as they were given to me!
I had always identified more with Mary as far back as I could remember, but at this retreat, I came face to face with the fact that I had somehow, over the years, become more of a Martha!
When Tina mentioned this, my thoughts went flying back to a truly sacred moment, unlike any other I have ever experienced, when the Lord spoke to me…even in the midst of my complaining! I would like to share that remarkable moment with those who read this blog.
The tremendously gifted teacher, and our main speaker, Bob Mulholland (Author of Shaped by the Word) stopped in the middle of an afternoon talk and instructed us to take our Bibles, find a quiet spot somewhere on the grounds, and read the story of Mary and Martha. We were instructed to listen to what God might be saying to us in the midst of the reading. My heart sank! How many times had I read this story? How many retreats had I been to where this particular story was used as its focus? And now...at a Spiritual Formation Academy...here it was one more time!
Determined to find something positive in the assignment, I was immediately excited at the prospect of finding a spot outdoors, leaving the stuffy classroom behind for 30 minutes or so. It was a gorgeous fall day and the gentle breeze seemed to beckon me to come sit under a huge, old oak tree. I felt that with so many of my senses involved, surely I would be drawn into a state where some sort of pleasant communion with the Creator of the universe would take place!
As I sat down and found the scripture about the two sisters, I marked the spot and immediately closed my Bible. I just did not want to deal with it! I shut my eyes, leaned my head against the tree and felt the brush of a falling leaf float past the tip of my nose. How wonderful! What I wanted was for the Lord to come to me. I wanted to be with God...that's all! Just to sit with the Lord for a while...saying nothing, doing nothing. Just being with Him!
I found myself silently saying, over and over again, "Come Lord Jesus, I just want to be with you." Time and time again I said this until, seemingly out of nowhere, I realized a presence in a white robe was standing in front of me. I knew it was Jesus! I sat so still, not wanting the moment to pass!
Then He spoke! I'll never forget that moment...never forget His words. He said my name first of all! He said, "Gerrie, I want to tell you how much I love you. I've told you in so many different ways, but you keep forgetting." He did not say this with any sign of reprimand at all! It was as though he might have added, "and I'll keep telling you, as often as I need to."
My words, though I never opened my mouth, came back to Him, "But how can you love me as you did when I was a little child? So eager, so open?" His gentle response was priceless as He lovingly said, "To me, you've never changed." Oh my! How my heart speeds up as I remember these words.
The non-verbal conversation continued. I did not want the moment to end, but I remained sitting in complete silence...saying nothing for a while. Then I remembered, with a bit of guilt, the unopened Bible on my lap and the Mary and Martha assignment! Jesus knew my thoughts and said, "It's ok...go ahead. I will go with you into the scriptures."
Suddenly I found myself being defensive with God, saying, "but, someone had to feed the guests, Lord!" Then, I'll never forget this remarkable lesson as Jesus said my name the second time. He said, "Gerrie, I fed the 5,000, I could have taken care of this!" Once again, I felt no reprimand at all in his voice. I smiled at His words though as I opened my Bible and began reading.
That is where my account of this very real experience ends. It was a most extraordinary experience with the Lord. In this I identify with the scripture that says, "what you have heard in the night, you must speak in the day." It seems that it applies to this experience. I believe that what is given to one as a message from the Lord, though it is often very personal for a season, is eventually meant to be shared with those who have ears to hear.
I have shared with you, the reader. I pray you have heard these words and somehow been blessed by them, for these words were given to you as much as they were given to me!
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